I’m feeling pretty good and, actually… can I admit it? Confident at the moment.

I know this feeling probably won’t last as long as I would like, but after an incredible weekend that Elise and I had, I’m riding a bit of a high. I’ll save the details about why for another post—one that’s deserving of all our recent sexual escapades. It should be a very entertaining read, but back to this one.

Since I’m feeling pretty darn lucky, I decided to press my luck.

Last year, we had gone out for drinks and dinner with another couple who live fairly close by a few times. I thought we had the best time with them. We had quite a bit in common, at least I thought we did. We may have even gone back to their house, and clothes may have come off. I actually wrote about the experience here on our blog.

That was the last time we saw them.

Their lives got busy. Our lives got incredibly busy. We reached out a few times to let them know they were still on our minds and that we’d still be interested in just hanging out. They responded, but nothing ever really felt like it was leading to anything.

And honestly, I don’t blame them for not wanting to get back together with us.

When we first met them, we were not a very confident couple in the lifestyle. Especially me. I know I was probably a mess when we were back at their house. We were nervous, inexperienced, too green, and probably just way too awkward. We needed to grow a little, gain some personal experience, and get a few things under our belts.

Our last meet-up was well over eight months ago. I do miss them, and they still occupy a little space in my brain.

So today, I reached out to them.

It was just a basic text. Hey. Hope you both are doing great. Blah, blah, blah. We’d still be interested in getting together. Etc.

But… I included what I think was maybe a grown-up line.

I gave them an out.

Basically, I told them it was completely okay if they didn’t want to get together.

I understand all the reasons why they might not. Hell, I probably said or did something without realizing it that ruined our chances of getting back together. I know I can come up a few that would probably qualify.

Knowing what I know now, I was probably like some sort of nervous puppy sitting on their giant sectional couch while they were rolling their experienced, worldly, deep in the lifestyle, sexy young eyes at me.

I know it wasn’t anything that Elise did. I know I am generally the anchor that slows us down.  I am the brake to Elise’s lead-footed gas pedal. I admitted that then, because it was true.

I know my faults and issues and that was something my mother taught me to do. Admit our failures or shortcomings to others in passing, so they can’t turn it around and then use it against you later. They knew what they were getting themselves into.

It’s like keeping it “real”. But I also understand now that it can be a lot to put on someone, especially so soon after meeting them. I guess it’s my way of saying, I’m willing to learn and I’m willing to change for the better.

Maybe that was me before, and maybe it is still is.

I do think Elise and I are now closer to the same level. My foot is now pressing down on the gas pedal possibly just as much as Elise’s.

I guess i have met some great, sexy,  incredible women that are actually interested in me for being me. I feel like, I do have something to contribute. I’m not just along for the ride.

I’m an active participant.

I’m also okay with the fact that some things just aren’t meant to be. There can be a beginning and an end to things. We had fun, and I’m glad we had what we did. They were the perfect couple for us during the time we needed them.
They haven’t seen us during all this personal growth. In their minds, we’re probably frozen in time. We’re still the same strange people we were the last time they saw us.

Maybe they’re missing out on a fun night.

Maybe they’re right to let us go.

I don’t hold any grudges. I’m just feeling free.

It’s also a pretty good feeling to let something go. I reached out. I said what I needed to say. I gave them an easy way to say no.

The rest is up to them.

I also understand a little more now that Elise and I are pretty darn good people. I’m more comfortable in my own skin, and we’ve done some growing in the LS. We have a few couples to thank for helping us along the way, for putting up with us while we figured some things out, and I’m incredibly happy those people are still in our lives.

I know we’d have fun with them again.

But I also know we’ll have fun with other people, too.

I’m sure our paths will cross again. It’s a small world.

Hell… Speaking of a small world, we actually ran into another couple we had met on our very first trip to Desire more than two years ago. They were surprised that I knew who they were and remembered them. They were—and still are—a great couple, and I remember talking with them in the pool like it was just yesterday.

Does that mean I want to get naked with them, throw them both on the bed, and have my way with them?

Nope.

But it was still great talking with them, and I wouldn’t say no to having dinner together.

And after this weekend…

Oh my God.

I know I can handle just about anything now.

Maybe someday they’ll be the ones sitting on their overly large, swinger-ready sectional couch, listening to our stories like a couple of wide-eyed puppies.

Maybe.

Maybe not.

News Flash: A few days after writing this post and before publishing it, they reached back out.  We are currently figuring out the next step, might look like. I will admit that I’m pretty happy about it. More than anything, I’m just excited to see them again. Even if we all we end up doing is sitting around talking about our summer vacations, our kids, and all the fun adventures we’ve been having, that would be golden.

I would love for this to be the start of another fun chapter. I’m glad I didn’t just sit by and wait for something to happen.

I don’t want to get too far ahead of myself, but I’m definitely smiling about this one.